Sunday, October 20, 2013

The V's and P's of Anatomy

We don't have rugrats of our own, so we miss out on the funny and awkward questions they ask. Like when Mariana (my 6 year old niece) was rubbing Tubby's belly last weekend, and her hand brushed up against his very pronounced boys - he has white fur, but he's got a dark coloured scrote (yes, I'm sooooo mature). She turns to Anita and I, and asks "What's that?". 'Ta and I just looked at each other and laughed nervously without answering.

Now I know some of you are rolling your eyes and thinking we should have just explained that they are TESTICLES, because it's better to have that conversation in a safe controlled environment rather than her learning about them with peers her own age (ie: yucky boys). But this isn't my kid. I shouldn't have to have the V's and P's conversation with her. V's and P's stands for Vags (pronounced with a 'J' sound) and Peens, in case you didn't make that connection. Again, I'm sooooo mature.

Anyways, I was trying really hard (ha... there's a bad pun in here somewhere) to find a photo that could appropriately represent the awkwardness of this moment, but alas, I don't routinely take photos of dog scrotums... and yes, I'm giggling as I write that. So I leave you with another edition of the Dead Bird Diaries instead, only it's not a bird. Welcome to the Dead Squirrel Diaries, episode 1.

The Dead Squirrel Diaries
Photo: Asahi Pentax 6x7, Takumar SMC 105mm f/2.4, on T-Max 400. Developed in Ilfosol 3, 1+14 at 68 deg. F for 10:00.


  1. On Thanksgiving weekend Stella (age 4) called her cousin a Penis Head.

  2. You should have corrected her. The proper way to express that sentiment is DICKHEAD. Followed by an exclamation mark.